Helping a Partner, Friend or Teen Quit Smoking

This page is general information from Health Canada. It cannot replace advice from a doctor, nurse practitioner or pharmacist.

How can I help someone quit smoking?

Start by accepting that it is their decision. Health Canada’s advice to friends and family is to say plainly that quitting is their choice and that you care about them no matter what they decide. Let them pick their own quit date, tell them you care about their health and will help when they are ready, and, if they mention quitting, tell them you believe they can do it.

You can also do some legwork. Health Canada suggests looking up quit resources online and in your community so you have the information on hand when they ask. The free quit help by province table is a quick place to start.

What should I do once they have stopped?

Health Canada lists these:

1. Be understanding. Learn about nicotine addiction and withdrawal. Withdrawal symptoms appear within one to two days, peak in the first week and last about two to four weeks, according to Health Canada, and can include restlessness, anger, sadness and trouble concentrating or sleeping.
2. Be sensitive to their moods. Sometimes they will want help or to talk about progress, sometimes space.
3. Ask what they need. It may be distraction, encouragement, help avoiding temptations, or just someone to listen.
4. Listen without judging or offering advice.
5. Offer rewards with care. Celebrating success can help, but a reward can make someone feel bad if they do not succeed right away.
6. Remember who they are. Health Canada’s phrase is that they are your friend or family member first, and a person who smokes second.

To understand what they may be going through, the page on how long cravings last is a useful read.

What if they slip?

Do not guilt or shame them. Acknowledge that quitting is hard, encourage them to keep trying, and say you will help when they are ready to try again. Health Canada also says it can take several attempts to quit successfully. The after-a-slip guide covers their side of the same conversation.

What should I avoid?

• Smoking around them.
• Making them feel guilty or ashamed after a slip.
• Judging them, or lecturing when they want to be heard.
• Pressuring them with rewards that could make them feel worse if they struggle.

If you smoke yourself, Health Canada says to avoid smoking around them and encourage them, and that quitting alongside them is an option. If you share a home, read quitting when someone at home smokes.

How do I talk to a teenager who smokes?

Health Canada’s advice to parents is to share how you feel about their smoking and to speak with respect, recognizing that they can make responsible decisions. Ask for their views: why they smoke, what pressures they feel and whether they have thought about quitting. Point out the benefits of quitting and other ways to express individuality, such as hobbies, clothing or music, discuss the cost of smoking and what that money could buy instead, and let them come up with their own rewards. It also notes that a free guide for youth who want to quit smoking or vaping can be ordered from Health Canada.

Where can I get help for myself?

The toll-free pan-Canadian quit line, 1-866-366-3667, offers free advice and support to people helping someone quit. Health Canada also lists the free service for each province and territory. If the person you want to help is pregnant, there is a dedicated guide on quitting smoking while pregnant.